guys are not supposed to queef...right?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
