Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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