The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
babies were throwing up all over the place
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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