I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
