SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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