I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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