i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
