on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
