Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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