dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
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