I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize