Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
