went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown