Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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