Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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