I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
