That's intense
Fuck appropriateness.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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