she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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