The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize