I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize