i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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