i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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