it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize