I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
