the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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