I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Randomize