you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
