my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
