Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
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Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
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When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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