You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
