He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
