I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
