So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Small penises have feelings too.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
