he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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