On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
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You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
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I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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