I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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