I love black thongs
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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