Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.

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(716): View more from New York

he smelled like listerine and beef tacos

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks

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(805): View more from California

WHY are the edges of my bra charred???

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.

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(210): View more from Texas

He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now

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(503): View more from Oregon

im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night

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(807): View more from Ontario

I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....

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