i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.