scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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