You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
