you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize