It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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