ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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