I'm pants shitting drunk right now
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize