This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
