Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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