why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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