He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
please come you make the beer taste better
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
