Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
