My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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