What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
