It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic