I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
